MY BLACKBERRY IS NOT WORKING. – I bought something from you last week, and I'm very disappointed. – Oh yeah? What's the problem? – Yeah, well, my blackberry is not working. [laughter, applause] – What's the matter, it run out of juice? [laughter] – No, no, it's completely frozen! [knocking on table] – Oh, yeah, I can see that. I tell you what: let's try it on orange. [laughter] – That's got a few black spots, you see... – Oh, dear, yes. Sorry about that. – Well, is there anything I can do to get my blackberry working? – Well, could be an application issue. Where'd you store that Blackberry? – Well, it was on my desktop. – Well, you could try using a mouse to drag the blackberry to the trash. [laughter] Then after you've done that, you might wanna launch the blackberry from the desktop. [laughter] – Well, I've already tried that a few times. I mean, all it did was mess up windows. [laughter] – [clears throat] Well, it might be worth waiting a couple of weeks. They've got the latest blackberries coming in then. – Well, could you give me a date? – Certainly. [laughter] – Let me put that date in my diary. [laughter] – Anything else I can help you with? – Yes, yes. I've also got a problem, to be honest, with my apple. [laughter] – Oh, dear, oh, dear. That is an old apple, isn't it? – Yeah. – When'd you buy that? – Last week. – Last week? They've brought out two new apples since then! [laughter] What's the problem with it? – Well, I tried to put my dongle in it... [laughter] and it won't fit. – Oh, yeah. [laughter] And how big's your dongle? – Well, I don't know much about these things, but my wife's seen a few dongles in her time... [laughter] and she says a little bit on the small side. [laughter] – Well, I'm afraid there's not a lot I can do about that. Tell you what: let me try booting it. [glass shatters] Now it's crashed. [laughter, applause] Anything else I can help you with? – Well, funnily enough, yes. My grandson's birthday's soon. – Oh, yeah. – Now, he's already got an apple and a blackberry. I mean, have you got anything else that he might just like? – Well, we're doing a special offer on these. I mean, I can't make head or tail of them, but the kids seem to like them. – Oh yeah? – "Eggs box," £3.60. [laughter, applause]