"Truths are as fragile as the people who have formulated them." "It's your own perception that's changed, because from one day to the next you've turned into a different person." ("The Centre of the World" by A. Steinhofel)- How to find your place in this world?

Agnieszka Grochowska - 11.10.2018 @ 17:01

So, this is what Catarina Becker, Lilly Paulmann and me, Yasmin Ben Touhami, (HPS Buxtehude) think about the topic :)

Is the way of life clearly defined?

by Catarina Becker, Lilly Paulmann, Yasmin Ben Touhami, HPS Buxtehude/ Germany

„Live a good honorable life. Then when you get older and think back, you’ll be able to enjoy it a second time. “ -Tenzin Gyatso (Dalai-Lama)

By this statement the Dalai-Lama wants to show us a way to create this essay. But first of all, it would be nice to clarify what exactly “the way of life” is.

So, Dr. Internet says: “Personal tenure, beginning with birth and ending with death.” However, is it really so easy? Can one plan or structure ones whole “way of life”? The answer is distinct and also simple because it is 'No!’ The way of life is an individual path and defined in so many different ways.

http://kenbirks.com/outlines/path-life.htm

For many of us religion, norms or conventions determine our day. Even specific ways to see something or a motto could coin our way to see things. Or, in other cases, nothing particular. 

Whatever one’s way of life looks like, there are always exceptions. Like the exceptions of conjugating verbs (to be honest, it is sometimes pretty annoying). And the truth is, it is annoying not to be able to foresee or predict the way of life.

Many cannot see through this path and are unable to handle the question of life… Since the way does not proceed neither in a normal nor in a straight way. Heights and depths distinguish the way, like a wild rollercoaster ride:

We enter the coaster, full of euphoria and having expectations of the journey. The Future.

Then, the wagon starts to roll and gravity pushes you to the ground while you incessantly ride up. You grow up. Without any control you reach the summit of the rollercoaster and the one of your life.

The one summit that is different for everyone. The one decision that changes your life completely. And from there the fun part starts: the calm and straight way of childhood is replaced by loopings. Decisions duplicate, desires are unreachable, promises lose their worth und with the increasing number of responsibilities the number of loopings and bends also increases.

And then? You feel overwhelmed. Overwhelmed by the knowledge that this could be the last looping. The last sharp bend. The last and only rollercoaster ride when euphoria falls, the screams hush and the pulse regulates.

Our life is not infinite. And that is actually a good thing, considering these long and boring infinite lives in Twilight and Co. No, our life could end tomorrow or in a week or in 30 years. And discovering this way of life everyday anew is almost impossible. But we have to do it. To the very end.

Frequently we try to arrange our life perfectly. To structure it, as if one could foresee outer factors. But is it really necessary? Is not this experience a part of “the way of life”?

Is the way of life maybe only a combination of “maybes” and “accidentallys”?

Does the way of life become livable in this way?

The answer is, we do not know. Nobody knows, because everyone’s way of life is different. The average number of decisions a human being is capable of making per day is 20 000. Starting with the question if you want to wake up, the choice between spaghetti or salad for your meal and the decision whether to do the physics homework or not. Every decision affects your day, your everyday life and your life as a whole.

So, make decisions, no matter id they are right or wrong, ride this freaking rollercoaster until the end, experience the livable way of life and in the end be able to look back to your life and enjoy it a second time.

Yasmin Ben Touhami - 13.11.2018 @ 16:46

Hi Catarina, Lilly and Yasmin!

First of all, I loved your article, especially that you could write it in a humorous way. The way of life is determined by so many different events that we, most of the times, can’t control. I feel that your comparison of the way of life to a rollercaster is very accurate- everybody’s life has its ups and downs and you never know what will happen to you in a moment. Again, I agree that in every life there are incidents that change us completely. Our lives aren’t infinite and we can’t go back in time to change our decisions. There is also no chance that we won’t make any mistakes in our lifetime. Who knows if our choice of breakfast can change the whole world completely?  The crucial thing is that we should not rush before making a serious decision and have plan B if something doesn't work out. As you wrote in  your article- the most important thing in life is to be able to look back on your life and enjoy it the second time.

Martyna Kołek - 15.12.2018 @ 16:51

Hi Girls,

I like the way in which you looked at the topic. I agree with you that we can't be sure about our future. We are beings whose influence isn’t too big in a very huge universe. There are so many accidents and situations which change our lives totally. I have one additional remark concerning your work. And I like your approach but one question comes to my mind: “What’s next?”. What is the conclusion of all of this?

This unknown future doesn’t mean that we should live like, sorry for the comparison, cows which go on to the grassland every day, eat grass and do nothing. They have uncertain future too. But we are not them. People are ambitious and they want to achieve some aims. If we don’t look ahead we will do nothing for maybe 60-70 years! Everyone has some goals and an “act to play” in our “Big Earth Theatre”, so it’s impossible not to make any plans, even if we don’t know the script.

Alicja Danielak - 08.01.2019 @ 21:26

Hello Catarina, Lilly and Yasmin!

I think you three found a really good way to describe the way of life with all his unsure adventures and hidden surprises. You mentioned that everybody has to do many decisions every day and how they can change everything, but in the end we will never know what would have happened if we had chosen a different alternative. Every decision affects our life in a certain way we often can't change, but I think it's also very important to learn from our experiences.

We should try to make our own unique way of life, because if everyone went the same way, there wouldn't be so many different and interesting people to meet. Everybody has an own way, which is best for him and I'm sure everybody is able to find it if they try. Even if our way is hard sometimes, there are surely some friends of family who are happy if they can help, because nobody should have to walk his way of life alone.

Johanna Holaubek - 09.01.2019 @ 18:44

Hello Catarina, Lilly and Yasmin!

I really enjoyed reading your thoughts about “the way of life”. Actually, it made me enthusiastically about going my way; living my life. I absolutely agree with your opinion(s). Everyday has its own ups and down and I think that it would help people to see the ups. I mean even if your day was very hard, try to focus on the little things, which make you happy e.g. a compliment from a friend, a smile from a stranger, the weather, … (It also helps to stand in front of a mirror and make some grimaces 😉). Another advice for people who struggle remembering that our life is worth living is to go trough the good moments of a day before sleeping. Well I’m in a good mood right now (I hope you too) and I wish that every one of us will make our way (it won’t be easy, but that’s quite clear I think 😉). So don’t give up!

Bye I have to live my live right now (should I send it or not? Another decision to made…)

Victoria Zawadil - 08.02.2019 @ 19:38

Hey Catarina, Lilly and Yasmin,

thank you for this article, I really appreciate your description of 'the way of life' and think it's very important to keep the words you wrote in your mind everyday!

Many people forget about the limitedness of life. They just let their days pass by and never do the things they think about doing and never say the words they think about saying. But life is about saying and doing all those things you want to do and say, and you shouldn't stop yourselves from surpassing yourself. All of your decisions have an impact on your life, even if it's only a small impact, but we shouldn't stop ourselves out of fear. Our decisions are what constitute our life and they will shape 'our way of life'.               

                              Yara Krismer - 25.02.2019 @ 21:00